I must just say Fuck. Fuck, this, that, you, me, it and everything. The moment on the edge of depression and happiness. The space between pages 260 and 261. I leave you with Fuck.
His fleeting victory,
A flicker of memory,
Snuffed out by the dark.
You step out of the little metal box,
Gently falling until your boot catches the solid surface.
Condensation beads on the glass,
Your intake of air laboured from excitement.
The radio statics into life as Huston asks for updates,
Words pour out faster than they ever have before.
Seemingly weightless they float effortlessly,
But from your lips they are quickly swallowed by the void.
I know that frightens you,
But have faith.
You had to go,
To find yourself amongst the stars.
Never feel pale in comparison,
Because as you float up there. .
You shine the brightest.
“Moonlight drowns out all but the brightest stars.” – J.R.R Tolkien
That monster under my bed, is now the one inside my head.
The soft blue sky, rippling with white puffs of cloud.
The lemon sun cresting amongst the invisible stars.
Tall grass tickles my thighs, as sweat beads down my UV kissed skin.
Running through and untrampled field, picking blackberries as I go.
Sweet and tart juices drip from my lips as I sneak them from the basket.
That’s when my face was truly aglow.
Flowers grow, but never stay.
Much like our love that went away.
My beautiful sin,
Dancing within me,
Falling and rising,
Like flames stoked by desire.
Tonight my thoughts turn towards Belgium and my heart aches.
We must stand United in the constant threat. With much love, I stand with you.
I am Prideful.
I am Promising.
I am Strong.
I am a Slave to No Man.
I have put the gun to my head and set it back down.
I am half a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of whiskey.
I am a silent lullaby in a dark room.
I am the glow of a computer screen.
I am Growing.
I am an Uncle.
I am not Sorry.
I am a Wish in a Fountain.
I am a Bouquet of Flowers and a Pushed in Chair.
I am the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.
I am Odin and Thor.
I am Wodën.
I am me… and that’s okay.
My insides are burning!
I can feel the pain erupting through me.
I am destroying myself!
Just trying to look for you in someone else.
Being lost within love is a painful death!
The hang mans noose,
Fits like a glove around my heart.
I am falling through the trap door and suffocating,
On dreams of you. .